Hey man. Maybe it's time you quit that band.
The drummer's getting soft and slow.
Maybe it's time you went solo.
Find yourself an old Spanish guitar,
and take to the stage in some hole-in-the-wall bar,
drone in monotone to an audience of four--
call it your experimental phase.
And come meet me at the record store;
we'll scowl at the suckers in the hip hop aisle,
spending money on those corporate whores--
not like me or you, we're alright,
cuz we're true to ourselves--you know,
cuz we buy records that you've never heard of
and that makes us cooler than you.
Hey girl. Aren't you the most beautiful girl in the whole world?
We must have met before, I say.
Hell, I saw you six times on the subway, just today.
And would you give me a second glance
if you noticed that I shop at Goodwill for my pants?
Well, notice I didn't ask you on a date,
cuz I don't like pretty anyway.
So come meet me at the record store;
we'll scowl at the suckers in the pop rock aisle,
spending money on those corporate whores--
not like me or you, we're alright,
cuz we're true to ourselves--you know,
cuz we buy records that you've never heard of
and that makes us cooler than you.
Let's raise up our fists in disgust
at the consumerist bitch in the Old Navy shirt!
Don't she know that we're leading the resistance with details,
like working in retail and boycotting Starbucks?
(I'll never drink that stuff)
So come meet me at the record store,
and we'll scowl at the suckers in the punk rock aisle,
spending money on those corporate whores--
not like me or you. We're alright,
cuz we're true to ourselves.
You know, we buy records that you've never heard of,
we've got more of them than you can imagine,
not a single fucking one of them's ever going platinum,
and that makes us cooler than you.
